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The best thing you can do for recovery right now is to let go of self-blame. Kristin Neff, a pioneering self-compassion researcher at the University of Texas, suggests treating yourself as you would a good friend who is going through a hard time. 13 This may help you to reframe the relapse. You could say to yourself, "I'm not a failure. I just need to figure out what went wrong so it doesn't happen again."